Character Secret Thesaurus: Concealing a Sexual Identity

What secret is your character keeping? Why are they safeguarding it? What’s at stake if it’s discovered? Does it need to come out at some point, or should it remain hidden?

This is some of the important information you need to know about your character’s secrets—and they will have secrets, because everyone does. They’re thorny little time bombs composed of fear, deceit, stress, and conflict that, when detonated, threaten to destroy everything the character holds dear.

So, of course, you should assemble them. And we can’t wait to help.

This thesaurus provides brainstorming fodder for a host of secrets that could plague your character. Use it to explore possible secrets, their underlying causes, how they might play into the overall story, and how to realistically write a character who is hiding them—all while establishing reader empathy and interest.

For instance, let’s see what it might look like if your character…

Is Concealing Their Sexual Identity

ABOUT THIS SECRET: A character concealing their sexual identity is living a double life, caught between the fear of exposure and the risk of immeasurable personal loss. But coming out could mean losing their support network, family, or sense of safety, making it a secret many will go to great lengths to protect.

SPECIFIC FEARS THAT MAY DRIVE THE NEED FOR SECRECY: Abandonment, Becoming What One Hates, Being Attacked, Being Judged, Being Labeled, Being Separated from Loved Ones, Being Unsafe, Betrayal, Change, Conditional Love, Conflict, Death, Discrimination, Humiliation, Isolation, Letting Others Down, Losing Financial Security, Losing One’s Social Standing, Losing the Respect of Others, Not Fitting in, Persecution, Putting Oneself out There, Rejection, Trusting Others

HOW THIS SECRET COULD HOLD THE CHARACTER BACK
Feeling inhibited in relationships, especially romantic ones
Letting a potential soulmate go so the secret remains hidden
Feeling as though no one truly knows or understands them
Feeling undesirable because they’re hiding who they are

BEHAVIORS OR HABITS THAT HELP HIDE THIS SECRET
Dating a partner they’re not attracted to or are incompatible with to keep up appearances
Lying about current or past relationships to align with their perceived orientation
Deliberately avoiding LGBTQ+ spaces or conversational topics
Avoiding people they fear may disapprove of their orientation

ACTIVITIES OR TENDENCIES THAT MAY RAISE SUSPICIONS
Going to a bar or club that caters to a different sexual identity
Consuming media that caters to a different sexual identity
Roleplaying romantic connections with partners who attract them in safe scenarios (e.g., video games, bedroom games, etc.)
Developing emotionally intense relationships with people they’re actually attracted to

SITUATIONS THAT MAKE KEEPING THIS SECRET A CHALLENGE 
Feeling sexually attracted to someone who returns the feelings
Feeling unsatisfied in a long-term romantic relationship
Being highly visible in their social standing so their life is intensely scrutinized
Engaging in a secret romance with someone they’re attracted to

Other Secret Thesaurus entries can be found here.

Need More Descriptive Help?

While this thesaurus is still being developed, the rest of our descriptive collection (18 unique thesauri and growing) is accessible through the One Stop for Writers THESAURUS database.

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