Debilitating fears are a problem for everyone, an unfortunate part of the human experience. Whether they’re a result of learned behavior as a child, are related to a mental health condition, or stem from a past wounding event, these fears influence a character’s behaviors, habits, beliefs, and personality traits. The compulsion to avoid what they fear will drive characters away from certain people, events, and situations and hold them back in life.
In your story, this primary fear (or group of fears) will constantly challenge the goal the character is pursuing, tempting them to retreat, settle, and give up on what they want most. Because this fear must be addressed for them to achieve success, balance, and fulfillment, it plays a pivotal part in both character arc and the overall story.
This thesaurus explores the various fears that might be plaguing your character. Use it to understand and utilize fears to fully develop your characters and steer them through their story arc. Please note that this isn’t a self-diagnosis tool. Fears are common in the real world, and while we may at times share similar tendencies as characters, the entry below is for fiction writing purposes only.
Infidelity
Notes
Relationships are built on trust, and when one partner cannot trust the other, the entire relationship is jeopardized. In some cases, the partner may have a history of cheating or questionable relationships. In other situations, the character may be projecting their own self-doubt and insecurities onto their partner. This fear could become so great in the character’s mind that, despite a desire or need for romantic relationships, they’re avoided altogether.
What It Looks Like
The character doubting their own abilities and attractiveness
Being overly jealous or territorial
Secretly checking up on a partner—accessing their phone without permission, following them, etc….
Common Internal Struggles
The character wanting to trust their partner but being unable to do so
The character worrying that the partner is disappointed in them (physically, intellectually, etc.)
Experiencing soaring anxiety despite having no tangible reason for it…
Hindrances and Disruptions to the Character’s Life
Relationships ending due to unfounded accusations or spying
Being unable to enjoy relationships because of overwhelming worry
The character’s pushy or suspicious behavior pushing their partner into an affair (creating a self-fulfilling prophecy)…
Scenarios That Might Awaken This Fear
The character’s lover starting a project with an attractive or aggressive co-worker
A friend’s relationship falling apart due to cheating
The character finding suspicious texts or emails…
Other Fear Thesaurus entries can be found here.
Fear is a Crucial Piece of Your Character’s Arc
Fear will hold your character back in the story and affect how they see themselves and the world. It’s defining, determining who they are at the start of your story and what they’ll have to overcome to succeed in the end. Don’t overlook or underestimate this vital piece of the character’s arc.
The content you’ve just read is a sample of one entry found in our Fear Thesaurus at One Stop for Writers. To access the complete entry and the other collections in this
Becca Puglisi is an international speaker, writing coach, and bestselling author of The Emotion Thesaurus and its sequels. Her books are available in five languages, are sourced by US universities, and are used by novelists, screenwriters, editors, and psychologists around the world. She is passionate about learning and sharing her knowledge with others through her Writers Helping Writers blog and via One Stop For Writers—a powerhouse online library created to help writers elevate their storytelling.
Thank you for your post on Infidelity, Becca. Please include virtual infidelity, the fantasizing of sexual engagement with someone or others separate from the spouse, fiance, girlfriend/boyfriend, or significant other. The tools of the trade are pornographic videos, magazines, print, digital, and audio books, and phone sex that place an ever larger wedge between real physical human to human interaction and the imagined human touch. Any form of pornography has the potential to damage or destroy a real life loving relationship.